True Love and In Love.
True Love and In Love.
When we are "In Love" we are more tied into our emotions, our fantasies, our needs and this could blind us to the deeper meaning of "True Love" wants to give us. When we experience the True Love with other person, we are achieving oneness. We reach a state of consciusness where we feel their pain as if it happen to us. Ultimately, we can experience the divine when we are involved in such a relationship. Unfortunately, we are under the influence of our "Ego" so our inclination is to look for the quick fix. Instead of creating a healthy relationship, we develop what we call as "addiction".
We hear the word of addiction and it is associated with drugs, alcohol, food and gambling but yes, we can also become addicted to people, to relationship and to "love".
Addiction happens whenever our happiness is dependant on an outside source.
Think of how many times you have felt you couldn't live without a particular friend or someone you were attracting or dating to. Perhaps you couldn't stand the thought of losing her/him. And haven't you had times it seemed impossible to get thru a situation without him or her. You needed them in order for you to feel capable and complete.
When our self-worth becomes entangled in what "they" think of us, How "they" see us, how we feel when we are with or without "them", we have made the other person the cause and left ourselves to be the effect. For not too long, we are searching everywhere for that energy, that high, until --boom--it explodes in our face.
Addiction is not to be confused with affection.
Having affection for someone--wishing that person happiness, or wishing them to be free from suffering ----is a wonderful thing, providing there is no agenda attached. This is what we are striving for : unconditional love and compassion. With affection, we do not feel as if our very existense is tangled up with another's.
Addiction, on the other hand is like "glue". We feel useless without that special person. We can feel as if there is no point to our lives without them and while relationships are vital and necessary, relying on them or on anything other than you and your ability to generate the Light is futile.
The test to determine whether you are "in Love" or experiencing "True Love" is to ask yourself this question i.e : "If I had to let this person go, could I ? And would I survive ?.
So if you are "In love" you will always posses the "sifat" of jealousy, rage, pain and try to maintain it for your own sake whereas experiencing the "True Love" you are more concern about the being of your loved one without considering whether you could own it personally or not. There is no string attached. This is also the basic principal in every marriage that is valid for both parties, not only the husband or the wife. This is what I called "a divorce" situation in a real "marriage".
salam,
hs
----
Copy paste dari tulisan Mas Hario di milis tetangga:)
When we are "In Love" we are more tied into our emotions, our fantasies, our needs and this could blind us to the deeper meaning of "True Love" wants to give us. When we experience the True Love with other person, we are achieving oneness. We reach a state of consciusness where we feel their pain as if it happen to us. Ultimately, we can experience the divine when we are involved in such a relationship. Unfortunately, we are under the influence of our "Ego" so our inclination is to look for the quick fix. Instead of creating a healthy relationship, we develop what we call as "addiction".
We hear the word of addiction and it is associated with drugs, alcohol, food and gambling but yes, we can also become addicted to people, to relationship and to "love".
Addiction happens whenever our happiness is dependant on an outside source.
Think of how many times you have felt you couldn't live without a particular friend or someone you were attracting or dating to. Perhaps you couldn't stand the thought of losing her/him. And haven't you had times it seemed impossible to get thru a situation without him or her. You needed them in order for you to feel capable and complete.
When our self-worth becomes entangled in what "they" think of us, How "they" see us, how we feel when we are with or without "them", we have made the other person the cause and left ourselves to be the effect. For not too long, we are searching everywhere for that energy, that high, until --boom--it explodes in our face.
Addiction is not to be confused with affection.
Having affection for someone--wishing that person happiness, or wishing them to be free from suffering ----is a wonderful thing, providing there is no agenda attached. This is what we are striving for : unconditional love and compassion. With affection, we do not feel as if our very existense is tangled up with another's.
Addiction, on the other hand is like "glue". We feel useless without that special person. We can feel as if there is no point to our lives without them and while relationships are vital and necessary, relying on them or on anything other than you and your ability to generate the Light is futile.
The test to determine whether you are "in Love" or experiencing "True Love" is to ask yourself this question i.e : "If I had to let this person go, could I ? And would I survive ?.
So if you are "In love" you will always posses the "sifat" of jealousy, rage, pain and try to maintain it for your own sake whereas experiencing the "True Love" you are more concern about the being of your loved one without considering whether you could own it personally or not. There is no string attached. This is also the basic principal in every marriage that is valid for both parties, not only the husband or the wife. This is what I called "a divorce" situation in a real "marriage".
salam,
hs
----
Copy paste dari tulisan Mas Hario di milis tetangga:)
posted by oasis at 9:13 AM
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